Michael: You seem more villainous than normal, mom. Are you sober? Lucille: Michael, it's 8 in the morning! Michael: ...So it's not that. I like the X-files and Star Wars and Arrested Development and eating and napping and being outside and rolling my eyes at everyone who says anything ever. If you're struggling for an opening line, you should tell me what your favorite insect is! Or maybe your favorite arthropod! If I could describe myself in one word, it would be cantankerous. People usually describe me as a curmudgeon. So that's fun.